“Self-published.” Is that still a dirty word? I can’t tell. With so many e-books, tree-books and free books out there, it’s almost foolish not to take advantage of whatever opportunity’s at your disposal to get published.
Publishing, of course, is easy. Getting noticed, on the other hand, is hard. You just never know what lucky arse is going to become the next big thing (see Fifty Shades of Arse).
It’s our job as bloggers no one reads to point the way to books no one’s reading… yet. And with so many would-be funny writers out there, we should highlight the genuine are-be funny ones.
Which brings me to The Hamster Won’t Die by Whitney Collins. Whitney is quite simply one of the funniest writers on the web. If she had a nickel for every one of her Facebook posts that made me laugh, she’d have a whole lot of nickels, which would probably be a tripping hazard, to tell you the truth.
She’s funny in her own right (which is a play on words, see, because of the fact that she “writes” and is in fact “right” handed; amazing the English language, n’est-ce pas?) but she also cultivates other emerging humorists on her two websites Errant Parent and The Yellow Ham. Plus, she’s a mom with two mouths to feed — tiny hamster mouths, each of which can store an astounding 37 nickels between vaguely creepy cheeks.
The book is a collection of short pieces that take all the bad thoughts you have as a parent or modern adult or escaped felon and gives voice to them. If you’ve ever fantasized about drowning kittens (but in a hilllllarious way), Whitney’s your gal!
Sure, you could find a lot of these items online but who has time to trudge through the Internet? And then you have to type in her name… “W-H-I-T-N… ADHD I’M SO BORED! Ooo look, a funny piece in The Onion!”
Plus, can you take the Internet to the bathroom with you? No, you… well, yes you can. It’s really the only practical use for an iPad. But books are still the coolest, amiright? So show Whitney some love and order The Hamster Won’t Die.
P.S. I am not being paid for or coerced into this endorsement. I swear I have never had Internet relations with that woman!
P.P. S. Unless by “Internet relations” you mean she’s published my pieces and sent me a keen ball cap for my troubles.