Because of the love, that’s why. Because of the love and the books that I need to clear out of my Wonky Drawer of Stuff™ but mostly because of the love I have for you — yes YOU, dear readers — I am holding my first-ever (and probably last-ever) contest with not one but TWO books to give away! And that is IT for the all-caps words in this post, but I can’t guarantee I’ll rein in the over-exuberant exclamation marks!
The Wonky Drawer of Stuff™ is located in my bedroom. It’s wonky because, like skinny old me, it has no bottom. As a drawer, it’s really quite useless (the comparisons to me continue to amaze!). Instead, I use this space to stash items such as my many unsold books, the USB microphone I use to record my radio pieces, and an obsolete laptop port that I really ought to get rid of but hang onto because I have garbage guilt. This is also where I hide gifts for my wife along with the receipts so she can return them because I’m terrible at buying gifts for my wife.
The Wonky Drawer of Stuff™ is not to be confused with the Useless Drawer, which I wrote about over a year ago when I had just one reader named Frenchie. (Hey, Frenchie!) The Useless Drawer contains all the stuff you hang onto for reasons you can’t quite explain, like possibly exposed camera film or your abiding love for ‘N Sync. The Wonky Drawer of Stuff™, on the other hand, actually serves a function, though it is either consistently hard to access or requires multiple steps and/or violence to open.
So here’s the Contest Extrava-give-nza portion of this post. I have a copy of my latest collection, Don’t Everyone Jump at Once to give away, along with a copy of my 2010 collection You’re Not Going to Eat That, Are You? The reason I’m giving away the older book is because I’m frankly sick of looking at surplus copies mouldering away in the Wonky Drawer of Stuff™. But you’ll be honoured, I’m sure, to include it on your Wobbly Bookshelf of Books™!
All you have to do is tell me in the comments about your own Wonky Drawer of Stuff™ or Useless Drawer and what you keep there. I’ll randomly select two winners from the entries, so don’t worry, even if your comment sucks, you’re still in. That’s how desperate fair I am.
Contest ends when I feel like it.
YAY!!!! Now you.