Category Archives: Holidays

Yelp review of Bethlehem Best Eastern Inn

Posted on December 20, 2018 by

First of all, Bethlehem: get your act together. One inn? I know it’s a little town of Bethlehem, but, honestly, not even a Super 8 out by the Interdesert? Instead, just one lousy inn for the entire area. And in … Continue reading →

Posted in Holidays | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 39 Comments

Absolute Worst Christmas Tea & Bazaar

Posted on December 6, 2018 by

Come one, come all, come those paying in hoarded pennies to the Annual Christmas Tea & Bazaar this Saturday at the Church of Our Lady of Perpetual Ennui. We’ve recently lowered the ceiling of our fluorescent-lit basement hall to allow … Continue reading →

Posted in Holidays, It Could Happen... | Tagged , , , , | 29 Comments

Don’t be such a martyr, it’s All Saints Day!

Posted on November 1, 2018 by

Saint Tarafa the Putrid The Holy Hottie of Hungary, Tarafa the Putrid was named Saint of the Year in 1089, winning over the critics and plague-ridden alike with her hit song “Jesus May Have Come to Me (But I Wish … Continue reading →

Posted in Holidays, Never Happened | Tagged , , , | 12 Comments

The Pantsing: A Halloween Tale

Posted on October 25, 2018 by

Detective Marilyn Grendel took a drag off her cigarette like a teenage boy giving a hickey. She flicked the spent butt to the ground with a loathing usually reserved for relatives who owe you money. Adjusting her three-dollar blazer over … Continue reading →

Posted in Holidays, Never Happened | Tagged , , , | 32 Comments

The Wearing of the Ochre, or Happy St. Pablo’s Day!

Posted on March 15, 2018 by

I recently received the results of my ancestry DNA testing, and in addition to 70 percent of my genetic roots originating in Great Britain, and Scotland, I was very excited to learn that 12 percent of my genetic makeup springs … Continue reading →

Posted in Holidays | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 20 Comments

Muddling through somehow

Posted on December 21, 2017 by

This past weekend, while suffering from CSPD – Collective Seasonal Psychosis Disorder – I called up a Christmas playlist on my phone. That’s dangerous, the random playlist, because you never know when they’ll play Pentatonix and ruin your whole Christmas. … Continue reading →

Posted in Family - whadya gonna do?, Holidays | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 28 Comments

House decorations should be like me: simple and old

Posted on December 7, 2017 by

As a newly elected town councillor, my wife was invited to the town hall annual Christmas dinner, and as her spouse, I was invited along. That’s right: I was political arm candy, and I’ve never been prouder. Prior to leaving … Continue reading →

Posted in Holidays | Tagged , , , , , | 19 Comments