Category Archives: Never Happened

If brain begins leaking, apply pressure

World Funny Shortage Getting Serious

Comedy writer Axel Loffmann thought it was just him. Maybe he was going through a dry period. But when Loffmann asked around the comedy community (Schenectady), he started hearing the same thing over and over: they were all out of … Continue reading

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Overly Complicated Secret Santa

Dear Work Family! The leadership team at Weltzderp Cankerman & Tinkletrain invites you to join in the Merriment of the Holiday Season by participating in our Secret Santa Gift Exchange! This is a fun activity for all, and we hope … Continue reading

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My 30 Years in the Townships: You’re Welcome*

This fall marks the 30th anniversary of my arrival in the Eastern Townships. I thought the Town of Stanstead would be planning a parade to mark the occasion, but my wife is a municipal councillor and there was a conflict … Continue reading

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GODZILLA vs BILLY JOEL – Battle for Long Island: The Final Chapter!

[Scene: Inside a secret government compound, Patchogue] GENERAL FORTISSIMO: Dammit, Billy Joel! You’re the only man who can save Long Island from being wiped off the face of the Earth by that rampaging giant lizard! Godzilla has already stomped Sagaponack … Continue reading

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Border Story Story

DERBY LINE, Vt. — For generations, the sleepy towns of Stanstead, Quebec, and Derby Line, Vermont, have slumbered together in the proverbial twin beds of neighboring border communities. Most of the time, the two towns have dreamed their separate dreams … Continue reading

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