Tag Archives: humor

New Pot for Old Farts: A Guide

So, you’ve decided you’re going to start smoking pot again. Congratulations! First, though, stop calling it “pot.” These days, the cool kids call it “weed,” and that’s 30 percent the point of this entire exercise, right? To be cool again, … Continue reading

Posted in Canada and/or Quebec, It Could Happen... | Tagged , , , , , , , | 31 Comments

The Real Fate of the Furious

Short-term spike in blood pressure Tell-tale spittle droplets on conference room table Uncomfortable silence from co-workers Promise from supervisor in soothing voice to resolve problem Feelings of satisfaction that situation will be remedied thanks to forceful rhetoric Feelings of guilt … Continue reading

Posted in Reading? Ugh! | Tagged , , , , , | 20 Comments

The man with his hands on his hips

There was an image that flashed across the TV screen Sunday afternoon. I can’t be certain but it might have been an ad for IBM’s artificial intelligence app, Watson. “Hello. I am Watson,” a voice intones at the end, a … Continue reading

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Pump rage

My general state of being whenever I wait for a gas pump to free up can best be described as “seething.” I’m not great with waiting, even in a car surrounded by the endless possibilities of radio entertainment because, as … Continue reading

Posted in It Really Did Happen! | Tagged , , , , , , | 22 Comments

Father-daughter-Beyoncé bonding

Conversations these days with my 15-year-old daughter go something like this: Abby (getting out of the car): “Can you write me a note? I’m going to be late for class.” Me: “You’re not going to be late. Just be quick.” … Continue reading

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Out of the crawlspace, into the tree house

When I was little, my older brother and I would spend hours tunnelling into the piles of snow at the end of our driveway. This was back when we regularly got snowfalls of 17 feet at a time. Or something … Continue reading

Posted in It Really Did Happen! | Tagged , , , , , , , | 27 Comments

Re: New guidelines for the coming in/going out of March

The management would like to inform you that, in accordance with our recently adopted policy on heightened inclusivity and respect for species fluidity, March is no longer exclusively required to come in like a lamb and go out like a … Continue reading

Posted in Never Happened | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 32 Comments