Tag Archives: humour

The press conference about the press conference

Good morning, everyone. I think we can get started. First of all, thank you all for coming out to today’s press conference announcing today’s press conference. First, a little background about the press conference. As you know, the press conference … Continue reading

Posted in It Could Happen... | Tagged , , , , , | 28 Comments

In which I enter a literary contest and don’t expect to win, but still

November There is no way – no way in hell – that a self-published novel, no matter how passable, will win a literary contest. Especially if that novel has a cover that looks like someone left it in a damp … Continue reading

Posted in Canada and/or Quebec, Writing | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 31 Comments

Risky business for columnists

Hi there. How’s tricks? Does anyone say that anymore? “How’s tricks?” Sounds Damon Runyon-esque. That’s Damon Runyon, the American writer, not Damon Runyan, the Canadian actor and star of “Degrassi: The Next Generation,” though, honestly, what kind of parent does … Continue reading

Posted in It Really Did Happen! | Tagged , , , , , , , | 16 Comments

The ¼ buck stops here

A Canadian quarter from 1907 turned up in my wife’s change from the liquor store last weekend. I like to think it ended up there by way of a slow-moving nonagenarian war bride in a cardigan purchasing her bi-monthly supply … Continue reading

Posted in It Really Did Happen! | Tagged , , , , , | 36 Comments

The Interoffice Coffeemaker Arms Race

The office where I work is in a former home set a fair distance from the rest of the school. I’m alone on the second floor, making me the most outlying member of the school staff. I’m the institutional Pluto. … Continue reading

Posted in It Really Did Happen!, Reading? Ugh! | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 24 Comments

Emergency measures

This Saturday at Townshippers’ Day, I will officially launch my debut novel, A Hole in the Ground. Set in the fictional town of Beaverly, the plot hinges on a local disaster. And turtles. I can verify there are stampeding beavers. … Continue reading

Posted in It Could Happen..., Writing | Tagged , , , , , , , | 22 Comments

Stretch your food dollar until it screams for mercy

The cost of household groceries has mounted in recent months due to fluctuations in the dollar, poor growing conditions, End Times, etc. With the likelihood of high food prices continuing indefinitely (or if not indefinitely, at least until further notice), … Continue reading

Posted in Never Happened | Tagged , , , , , | 40 Comments