Tag Archives: parody

What your sleep position says about you

1. You are generous and fair, with the courage of a lion and the grace of a swan. You are thoughtful, inquisitive and a loving individual. Yet despite all your tremendous qualities, you are haunted by an emptiness because you … Continue reading

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Home for the Hollandaise: A Hallmark Christmas Movie

I know what you’re thinking: what’s a beautiful, successful New York gal like me doing in a Podunk town like Blamperville? I asked myself the same question when I first got here. Being a beautiful, successful New York journalist with … Continue reading

Posted in Holidays, Never Happened | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 15 Comments

The Seven Habits of Highly Effective Demons

1. Be proactive One of the prime mistakes demons make is waiting for lusty teenagers to randomly stumble onto a Portal to Hell in the basement of an abandoned cabin. After all, when you’re a demon condemned for all eternity, … Continue reading

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Death of a Salesman: The Musical

A melody is heard, played upon a flute, telling of grass and trees and the horizon. The curtain rises. The flute melody fades abruptly, replaced by an upbeat tune as the CHORUS OF DANCING SALESMEN enter carrying sample cases. They … Continue reading

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Simply mad about the booze

It seems not even sobriety will be saved from enjoying a made-for-Instagram moment, with new hashtaggable terms like “mindful drinking” and “sober curious.” No longer do you have to feel left out or uncool for being sober. You maybe don’t … Continue reading

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Three Minutes of Gardening and 30 Seconds of Heavy Drinking: Endless Winter Edition

Hello, and welcome to “Three Minutes of Gardening and 30 Seconds of Heavy Drinking.” I’m your host, Garland Faunt-Lubberly. As I gaze out the window of my humble cottage onto the fields filled with snow and the occasional corpse of … Continue reading

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Netflix “Originals”

Netflix’s ‘Russian Doll’: A Darker, Druggier ‘Groundhog Day’ – The Daily Beast, Feb. 1, 2019 ‘Bird Box’ Is The Netflix Version Of ‘A Quiet Place’- Zimbio, Dec. 27, 2018 The ‘Stranger Things’ Secret? It’s Basically an 8-Hour Spielberg Movie – … Continue reading

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